NEWS from Yes turd day

Late breaking news from Yes turd day

The Australian Federal Government
has decided to refine the metric system
by altering measuring devices
the present 60 kilometers per hour as in speed limits will now be converted to 60,000,000 millimeters per hour
the govt agencies may now alter there speed measuring devices to suit to refine speed limits and impose fines on any vehicle exceeding the speed limit by more than 10 mm per hour.
the next practical alteration will be in the fluid measurements as in fuel
presently X$ per liter will now be X cents per millimeter
rounded off to the next higher cent
other refinements on the metric measurements will be announced when a conversion is completed

the Bearer of good NEWS
CYA

Okay I'll bite,

When we changed over to Metric, with kilograms, kilometres an all that stuff, my mum sent me to the butchers and asked me to buy some sausages, but she said it in the old imperial measurement of a couple of pounds, so me being me I worked it out in Metric, you know 2.2 lb to the kilo, got to the butchers and asked for a Kilometre of thin sausages, "no worries" he said and he went in the back room, then came out with a large bag filled with sausages, "there you go son, one kilometre of sausages" And I said that seem to be a lot more than what mum wants, ah he said "your mum only wanted the usual which would be ONE KILOGRAM" not kilometre, bloody metric, quick leaner.

Charlie

(During a recent discussion, a bank manager heard the causes of a farming clients financial troubles.)

It all started back in 1966 when they changed the currency from Pounds to Dollars. My bloomin

Well Hayseed, that is tops.