Not funny

A man brings his best buddy back home for dinner.
His wife screams at him, "My hair & makeup are not done,
the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in
my pajamas & I can't be bothered with cooking tonight!!!
What the f**k did you bring him around for?"
"Cause he's thinking of getting married."

hahahahahah mate that is a cracker best one for a while for me thanks bk

I like it.

"Not funny"....oh yes it is . But be warned, do not laugh out loud at home. :-[

AND THATS WHEN THE FIGHT STARTED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >

My wife couldn't see the funny side of it either. Just like the rest of them, no sense of humour.

AND THATS WHEN THE FIGHT STARTED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >

Ahhhh, Scummy. Look what you've started..

---

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a

> Christmas gift...The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.

> When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"

> And that's how the fight started.....

> _____________________________

>

> My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.

> I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'

> 'No,' she answered. I then said,

> 'Is that your final answer?'

> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'

> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

> And that's when the fight started...

> _______________________________

> I took my wife to a restaurant.

> The waiter, for some reason, took my order first

> "I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."

> He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"

> Nah, she can order for herself."

> And that's when the fight started.....

> ______________________________

> My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and

> she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone

> at a nearby table.

> I asked her, "Do you know him?"

> "Yes", she sighed,

> "He's my old boyfriend.... I understand he took to drinking right

> after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."

> "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

> And then the fight started...

> _____________________________

> When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me

> that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else

> to take care of xxx, the shed, the boat, making beer.. Always

> something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.

> When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass,

> busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched

> silently for a short time and then went into the house.. I was gone

> only a minute, and When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I

> said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."

> The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

> ______________________________

> My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.

> She asked, "What's on TV?"

> I said, "Dust."

> And then the fight started...

> _______________________________

> Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and

> slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van,

> and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was

> blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio,

> and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into

> the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.. I cuddled up

> to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered,

> "The weather out there is terrible."

> My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid

> husband is out fishing in that?"

> And that's how the fight started...

> _______________________________

> My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

> She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3

> seconds."

> I bought her a bathroom scale.

> And then the fight started......


> _______________________________

> My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

> She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible;

> I look old, fat and ugly.

> I really need you to pay me a compliment'

> I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

> And then the fight started........

And then the fight started!!

fantastic BK still having a chuckle [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Paul

you no what say there different to us humans

Bloody good rib ticklers still having a giggle & even the trouble & strife had a laugh (not as loud as me)