Sometimes Sayings.

My Wife found this on the internet a couple of days ago:-

I had a great day today. At the store I asked the young girl behind the counter "Are these chicken drumsticks from the front legs or back legs?"
She said she would go and find out for me. She came back and said "Very Funny!"
I am still chuckling about it.

Some months ago, I watched a real-life program on TV that showed a Police Officer catching a horse that had escaped on to a road. As he shut it safely into a paddock, he stated that he did not know if it was male or female. The voice-over man said "There is an easy way to tell but a young Policeman cannot be expected to know everything".

Apology for being a wee bit off topic but the mention of father's day gifts led me having to share this one I spotted on Marketplace:



A bargain at $40 for the lot, with only one problem - I had to ask the wife to pick them up from one of her sons while in Adelaide. She hates doing that, but she was going there anyway, and even accepted that she would have to pay him the $40 as I had forgotten to give it to her before she left . . . :ohmy: :pinch:
All in all great value but then step-son said not to worry about the money, count it as my fathers day present.
Win win situation.
BUT While here I may as well mention one about somebody (definitely not a car tragic sort of bloke) who after years of never being able to use tyre pumps at garages, learnt that it helps to remove the dust cap first!!! :oops: :blush:
AND Morris, for years when ordering half a cooked chicken, I wait until they turn around and then add left side please . . . never fails to stop them in their tracks. :lol:

I told the genie I just want to be happy.
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I now live in a cottage in the forest with 6 dwarfs and work in a coal mine.

My Wife and I are going away today for about ten days and my laptop has never worked away from home but I will try it on my usual Monday.
Just so that you do not miss my pearls of wisdom (Ha Ha) I hear you sighing with relief. I will give you a few short ones:-

Are you here with the solution or are you part of the problem?
(unknown)

When things look too good there is trouble on the way.
(Mary Higgins Clark American author)

Once you have started, you are halfway there.
(Latin proverb)

My Mathematics teacher told us:-
Statistics don't lie but you can lie with statistics.

Another one my Wife found on the internet:-
At the dinner table a child asked Father, "What percentage of meat do these meatballs have?" Dad said About 90 per cent.
Child then said "They must be 10 percent Balls then."
Mother just about choked on her mouthful.

Hayseed, you are a naughty boy!

It does not affect me because I do not follow the State religion. The only time I have ever been to the MCG was on a private tour when there was no football going on.